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Being cryptic is rude unless you're a super villain & I wouldn't want to be that... to f-list anyway
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bhanesidhe Nov. 26th, 2007 11:20 am)
bhanesidhe Nov. 26th, 2007 11:20 am)Sorry for not updating over the weekend, I meant to do.
My Victor went away for the holidays and the same day he came back he went to hospital and is still being held for observation at Montefiore, so it's a bit distracting. We both suffer from anxiety attacks, or panic attacks depending on your definition of the term. (This explains, but doesn't excuse, a lot of our drama.) Only my way of handling it is acknowledging it and every once and a while crawl into a corner, clutch at the walls and measure my breaths before I blackout. His way has always been denying he's ill until the floor comes up to meet his face. In general, we're not panicky, we're very "Calm in Crisis" people, so it's hard to acknowledge that something as small as conversation can do us in when massive bloody sixteen hour re-constructive surgery hadn't fazed us.
(My god, I feel a need to explain, I didn't break the boy. His sister kept measuring his heart rate the entire time he was in Florida and that did his head in. By the time I got him home it took everything to keep him laying still and breathing. He was mad with anxiety and a fear of heart disease. Let that be a lesson to you folks, self-diagnosis is nonsense. Go To Hospital...so you can blame professionals! It's much more gratifying in the end.)
This has happened before, the over night observation stuffs, and we both know he'll be fine... but it's nerve racking to finally have him home and instantly have him taken away. So everything is fine, just feels not fine is all. The best way to deal is for me to keep busy.
Working on art today. That feels very good to say :)
...I'll write up a different post to announce Step 4. Doesn't feel right to include it as part of this madness.
My Victor went away for the holidays and the same day he came back he went to hospital and is still being held for observation at Montefiore, so it's a bit distracting. We both suffer from anxiety attacks, or panic attacks depending on your definition of the term. (This explains, but doesn't excuse, a lot of our drama.) Only my way of handling it is acknowledging it and every once and a while crawl into a corner, clutch at the walls and measure my breaths before I blackout. His way has always been denying he's ill until the floor comes up to meet his face. In general, we're not panicky, we're very "Calm in Crisis" people, so it's hard to acknowledge that something as small as conversation can do us in when massive bloody sixteen hour re-constructive surgery hadn't fazed us.
(My god, I feel a need to explain, I didn't break the boy. His sister kept measuring his heart rate the entire time he was in Florida and that did his head in. By the time I got him home it took everything to keep him laying still and breathing. He was mad with anxiety and a fear of heart disease. Let that be a lesson to you folks, self-diagnosis is nonsense. Go To Hospital...so you can blame professionals! It's much more gratifying in the end.)
This has happened before, the over night observation stuffs, and we both know he'll be fine... but it's nerve racking to finally have him home and instantly have him taken away. So everything is fine, just feels not fine is all. The best way to deal is for me to keep busy.
Working on art today. That feels very good to say :)
...I'll write up a different post to announce Step 4. Doesn't feel right to include it as part of this madness.
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Becca went through my DeviantArt the other day and the both of us have been veto-ing and selecting pieces that are worth entertaining. I can't have every piece in the show you know and I am no fecking judge of my own work. This stuff should come easy to me... but it's not. Which is fine because I love an up hill battle XD
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*sits on hands* I will not
singfilk the "keepin' busy cinderlley" disney song at you. I will not.From:
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